To be inspired. That is the thing. / to be possessed; to be bewitched. / To be obsessed. That is the thing. / To be inspired.
– William Baziotes
Ideas and inspiration can be such a precious resource.
Sometimes, mine can feel as fragile as butterflies. Delicate and flighty, try to grasp them too tightly and I snuff out the light.
Other times they’re like the pilot light on my finicky old Aga. Tiny, faintly flickering; one hot whoosh of fuel away from igniting into something hot and wonderful. One sudden gust of wind away from fading out completely.
It’s a common experience, I think. To have the spark of an idea but then lose it somehow - to self doubt, to overwhelm, to interruptions, to fear.
I’m curious to know, what are the recurring elements that kill inspiration for you?
For me, the list is something like:
The sound of my daughter crying - (even now, at 11, this is still frequent enough to be a thing)
The sound of my husband and daughter bickering.
Those first tendrils of anxiety that start to creep up inside me like ivy - not even fully fledged, yet, but already enough to make me want to shut down
Un-ignorable mess around me in the house
Being asked a completely unrelated question by somebody when I’m in the early stages of flow.
A cruel email or message in my inbox.
The irrepressible urge to sleep.
Thinking too big with an idea right away, and then overwhelming myself.
Feeling observed, perceived or judged in my playful creative process.
Sharing my idea with somebody else too early, and draining the energy out of it
What stops your ideas from all coming to fruition?
PS - I recently found this notebook series by Iroha Publishing while browsing Amazon Japan (as you do). It says they’re designed for capturing and logging ‘fragments of ideas’, and uses the metaphor of a quarry, with stickers shaped like gemstones and tiny stone seals. Obviously a notebook range cannot solve all of my idea/inspiration problems, but… maybe I need to get one just in case? What do you think? 🙈
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Haha number four is so relatable. Even a nice interruption is still an interruption, though! And the last one, too. It's all fun and games until the crippling overwhelm hits in!
Oh! And noisy neighbours upstairs. I don't think they mean to be, but previous occupants ripped up the carpets to expose the bare floorboards and the current occupants have a kid who has just learned to run (or is continually being chased by a bear, who knows.)
All of those resonate, the worst one is when I have the inspiration but not the ability to act on it straight away, and it becomes diminished and disappears. Overwhelm, fatigue, and interruptions all have a similar effect. Comparing myself to others, resulting in a ‘what’s the point’ feeling.
I also relate to nearly all of the items on your list, as well as many of those already shared in the comments. One of the biggest threats to inspiration for me at the moment is feeling like it is all for naught - that even if I do catch that spark and develop the idea and follow through to bring it about, it won't result in anything of significance. I often have initial flickers of excitement that are very quickly doused when the realization settles in that the effort will almost surely come to nothing.
yes, exactly! I remember how hard I worked on my first non-fiction book back in 2012, how devoted I was to it, seeing it through publication... and whilst I am proud of myself for having completed it, it really was all for nothing in any way measured by "society"...and I am terrified of it being exactly the same with each new amazing idea, so much so that I cannot force myself to even try.
Fully support the purchase of the notebooks. Most likely a sign of inspiration themselves, right?!
Inspiration killers for me include but are by no means limited to: a screeching cat, dogs needing in or out despite having just been, feeling cold, thinking I've probably already written it and I'm repeating myself, thinking someone else wrote it better either way, and just generally any minor inconvenience of a sensory nature. Yesterday, I got cold toes and had a scratchy label that needed chopped out of a t-shirt and it the idea I was so keen on just before immediately felt useless when I saw it again. It's amazing any of us ever make anything, really! 😆
What kills my ideas: Wondering if there’s an even better idea that could trump (sorry) my current idea, which has me already finding flaws in the current idea, even without a new idea and dumping the idea before giving it breath.
I used to do this far more frequently than I do now, but I still see it creep in.
This is a great post. I have thought about this a lot lately with my 10-year-old son who just entered puberty over the summer. YOWSER. My list would be like this:
My son whining and crying over not being able to use YouTube, game, or zone out on TV
My husband and son fighting - they trigger each other BIG TIME
When I post something on Substack or Instagram and I hear crickets and feel like a huge flop.
My guest room stocked with interior design things that are beautiful and organized but the room is literally a shop and I don't need/want 75% of it and it haunts me day and night.
Being a messy artist - I can't paint or do any DIY project without the entire area becoming a total mess.
Having someone standing over me when I type. I suddenly don't remember how to type at all. LOL
When you take a moment to comment on someone's Substack and they say nothing to you in return. They don't even like your comment. They just don't care - as long as they are hitting their marks whatever those are. This makes me unsub and move on, too.
When I'm in an empty cafe or train car and someone comes over and sits right next to me.
Amazon Japan - I’m ruined! 💸 Relate to all of the things that interrupt your flow, especially a harsh comment/email. For me, it’s life admin and thinking about life admin. I love working after 9pm because there’s little else to do; all the meals for the day are done and household tasks can wait til the next day.
The overwhelm and comparisonitis ... I tend to need to know every tiny detail and scope out the whole program with colored sticky notes and mind maps, and then I compare that thing to what other people have done/are doing and feel behind/small/icky because I don't want to do it the prey-on-fear/fast-paced/scarcity model way they are doing it and I don't see how my tiny contribution makes a difference in their noisy world.
For me it's a bit more internal... fear that I cannot complete the work to develop the idea...fear of failure and fear of success...fear of judgement and ridicule...
External things which stop me doing the work I love on my ideas include the presence of 3 cats who demand attention...my elderly housemates who keep a bizarre sleep "cycle" (could be any hour of any given day)...being overwhelmed by my own health issues...and my struggles with ADHD
For me I think about the whole project and get overwhelmed with all the things that would need to be done and think it seems impossible. And it probably wont make me much money like most of my dreams.
It's very often my inner critic in my case. The different parts of me tussle and fight. The ideas part is so free, playful and optimistic. But there is a frightened part of me which wants to protect me. So will inform me that's it's silly/ already been done better/ too big and overwhelming/ who are you to make that etc etc. I'm working on spending more time with idea me!
Hi Sara, goodness this is all so relatable and I thought it was just me! I love this analogy of ideas being like butterflies. My own butterflies flutter off all too quickly and I've never fully recognised this or explored it before. Definitely something to work on- and thankyou for the prompt xx
The tingles. Chills. That sparky feeling when something is so ridiculously exciting and right that it ignites something in your soul. I don’t know if there’s a name for that feeling but it sends my best ideas into hiding and invites a barrage of reasons why I shouldn’t do the thing.
In summary, self sabotage by sparky feelings.
Also, my brain. I just had one of those ideas and it was too good to let go and actually my brain has already erased it. It does this frequently and it’s one of the most frustrating by-products of my head injury.
Oh yes, I know this very well, and I love the comparison with the butterfly.
For me, it's also things like being asked a question just when I've sat down to jot something down or unexpected tasks from my family... they totally throw me off track.
I’ll take a look at the notebooks but I am not sure if they will ship it to germany
In my younger years, melancholy and angst were drivers of my creativity. So much so that I thought I had to be unhappy or unwell to create.
I’ve had to nurture my creativity into my more joyous, adult life. But it’s still fragile at times.
Now, thoughts of chores undone can squash a spark. A glance at the clock will tease that idea until it gets exhausted and takes off. Sometimes listening to or reading other people’s ideas suffocate my own.
There’s one cadence of daily creation that’s helped sustain my little sparks, though…
•Creation before consumption is currently my favorite way to structure my days.
Creation > chores > then consumption (reading, podcasts, learning, etc.).
Seems to be helping for the time being— except on days like today when I’ve picked up my phone first. This was a great reminder to go back to my “process.”
(& I’m lucky to have the freedom to nurture my creativity this way.)
Ooh for me it’s fatigue, too many ideas flooding in at once, mess, my partner playing music I don’t jam with *on his phone* (that sound is so tinny and grates 😝), nowhere to release the initial idea and so it just spins in my head until it runs out of steam…
I can relate to so many of those. For me my daughter or husband interrupting my flow in the early stages of creativity . The mess in my studio or apartment also kills it for me, and finally when my anxiety kicks in with the imposter syndrome
Aw lovely invite Sara. Hard relate! That last one thought - it’s really not talked about enough is it gosh - my entire early career was drowned in those accidental energy vampires in this face 🤔🫤. For me, it’s being interupted - like even the need to drink or answer the door when I’m talking or in flow, I’d just rather not. It’s a problem sometimes ❤️🫥
It feels like someone has crept into the loft rooms of my mind, these points all ring so very true with me. Yet I'm here on my own, no disturbances but still so many times, inspiration withers on the vine. I find working with an accountability buddy things progress better, the flame keeps burning merrily and I get things done
Thinking of all the ways it could go wrong.
A messy workbench.
Being uncomfortable, physically, like an uncomfy bra or something digging in.
My partner coming to check if I'm okay or to see if I want a cup of tea (I know, I'm horrid!)
Getting too carried away with the idea and then being frozen and overwhelmed.
Haha number four is so relatable. Even a nice interruption is still an interruption, though! And the last one, too. It's all fun and games until the crippling overwhelm hits in!
Oh! And noisy neighbours upstairs. I don't think they mean to be, but previous occupants ripped up the carpets to expose the bare floorboards and the current occupants have a kid who has just learned to run (or is continually being chased by a bear, who knows.)
arghh I'd struggle with this a LOT. New running sounds like there'll be bursts of tears and tantrums too!
All of those resonate, the worst one is when I have the inspiration but not the ability to act on it straight away, and it becomes diminished and disappears. Overwhelm, fatigue, and interruptions all have a similar effect. Comparing myself to others, resulting in a ‘what’s the point’ feeling.
Yes, this! Ideas that are like the first autumn fog - that is to say, beautiful but un-graspable.
I also relate to nearly all of the items on your list, as well as many of those already shared in the comments. One of the biggest threats to inspiration for me at the moment is feeling like it is all for naught - that even if I do catch that spark and develop the idea and follow through to bring it about, it won't result in anything of significance. I often have initial flickers of excitement that are very quickly doused when the realization settles in that the effort will almost surely come to nothing.
I’ve also experienced this feeling, it’s usually paired with a deep feeling of fatigue when contemplating what would need doing.
yes, exactly! I remember how hard I worked on my first non-fiction book back in 2012, how devoted I was to it, seeing it through publication... and whilst I am proud of myself for having completed it, it really was all for nothing in any way measured by "society"...and I am terrified of it being exactly the same with each new amazing idea, so much so that I cannot force myself to even try.
Fully support the purchase of the notebooks. Most likely a sign of inspiration themselves, right?!
Inspiration killers for me include but are by no means limited to: a screeching cat, dogs needing in or out despite having just been, feeling cold, thinking I've probably already written it and I'm repeating myself, thinking someone else wrote it better either way, and just generally any minor inconvenience of a sensory nature. Yesterday, I got cold toes and had a scratchy label that needed chopped out of a t-shirt and it the idea I was so keen on just before immediately felt useless when I saw it again. It's amazing any of us ever make anything, really! 😆
The dogs… their timing is always impeccable, eh 🤣
What kills my ideas: Wondering if there’s an even better idea that could trump (sorry) my current idea, which has me already finding flaws in the current idea, even without a new idea and dumping the idea before giving it breath.
I used to do this far more frequently than I do now, but I still see it creep in.
Oh yeah. Shiny new idea over there is so glimmery and tempting
This is a great post. I have thought about this a lot lately with my 10-year-old son who just entered puberty over the summer. YOWSER. My list would be like this:
My son whining and crying over not being able to use YouTube, game, or zone out on TV
My husband and son fighting - they trigger each other BIG TIME
When I post something on Substack or Instagram and I hear crickets and feel like a huge flop.
My guest room stocked with interior design things that are beautiful and organized but the room is literally a shop and I don't need/want 75% of it and it haunts me day and night.
Being a messy artist - I can't paint or do any DIY project without the entire area becoming a total mess.
Having someone standing over me when I type. I suddenly don't remember how to type at all. LOL
When you take a moment to comment on someone's Substack and they say nothing to you in return. They don't even like your comment. They just don't care - as long as they are hitting their marks whatever those are. This makes me unsub and move on, too.
When I'm in an empty cafe or train car and someone comes over and sits right next to me.
I so cannot type (or think) if someone is standing over me.
Amazon Japan - I’m ruined! 💸 Relate to all of the things that interrupt your flow, especially a harsh comment/email. For me, it’s life admin and thinking about life admin. I love working after 9pm because there’s little else to do; all the meals for the day are done and household tasks can wait til the next day.
The overwhelm and comparisonitis ... I tend to need to know every tiny detail and scope out the whole program with colored sticky notes and mind maps, and then I compare that thing to what other people have done/are doing and feel behind/small/icky because I don't want to do it the prey-on-fear/fast-paced/scarcity model way they are doing it and I don't see how my tiny contribution makes a difference in their noisy world.
Really resonate with your inspiration killers. And love the notebooks :)
Maybe we both need the notebooks Jan? And the stickers, too, of course. No point in having one without the other...
For me it's a bit more internal... fear that I cannot complete the work to develop the idea...fear of failure and fear of success...fear of judgement and ridicule...
External things which stop me doing the work I love on my ideas include the presence of 3 cats who demand attention...my elderly housemates who keep a bizarre sleep "cycle" (could be any hour of any given day)...being overwhelmed by my own health issues...and my struggles with ADHD
For me I think about the whole project and get overwhelmed with all the things that would need to be done and think it seems impossible. And it probably wont make me much money like most of my dreams.
Getting non-professional negative and perhaps unfunded feedback on your texts ( as in your precious draft of a novel). That's where I am now.
It's very often my inner critic in my case. The different parts of me tussle and fight. The ideas part is so free, playful and optimistic. But there is a frightened part of me which wants to protect me. So will inform me that's it's silly/ already been done better/ too big and overwhelming/ who are you to make that etc etc. I'm working on spending more time with idea me!
Hi Sara, goodness this is all so relatable and I thought it was just me! I love this analogy of ideas being like butterflies. My own butterflies flutter off all too quickly and I've never fully recognised this or explored it before. Definitely something to work on- and thankyou for the prompt xx
The tingles. Chills. That sparky feeling when something is so ridiculously exciting and right that it ignites something in your soul. I don’t know if there’s a name for that feeling but it sends my best ideas into hiding and invites a barrage of reasons why I shouldn’t do the thing.
In summary, self sabotage by sparky feelings.
Also, my brain. I just had one of those ideas and it was too good to let go and actually my brain has already erased it. It does this frequently and it’s one of the most frustrating by-products of my head injury.
Oh yes, I know this very well, and I love the comparison with the butterfly.
For me, it's also things like being asked a question just when I've sat down to jot something down or unexpected tasks from my family... they totally throw me off track.
I’ll take a look at the notebooks but I am not sure if they will ship it to germany
So many of your points are relatable.
In my younger years, melancholy and angst were drivers of my creativity. So much so that I thought I had to be unhappy or unwell to create.
I’ve had to nurture my creativity into my more joyous, adult life. But it’s still fragile at times.
Now, thoughts of chores undone can squash a spark. A glance at the clock will tease that idea until it gets exhausted and takes off. Sometimes listening to or reading other people’s ideas suffocate my own.
There’s one cadence of daily creation that’s helped sustain my little sparks, though…
•Creation before consumption is currently my favorite way to structure my days.
Creation > chores > then consumption (reading, podcasts, learning, etc.).
Seems to be helping for the time being— except on days like today when I’ve picked up my phone first. This was a great reminder to go back to my “process.”
(& I’m lucky to have the freedom to nurture my creativity this way.)
I’m just reading ‘the way of the fear less writer by @bethkempton and just going for it!
Nothing going to stop me writing, it’s my ME TIME for thinking and healing
Ooh for me it’s fatigue, too many ideas flooding in at once, mess, my partner playing music I don’t jam with *on his phone* (that sound is so tinny and grates 😝), nowhere to release the initial idea and so it just spins in my head until it runs out of steam…
I can relate to so many of those. For me my daughter or husband interrupting my flow in the early stages of creativity . The mess in my studio or apartment also kills it for me, and finally when my anxiety kicks in with the imposter syndrome
What kills my ideas fastest? Self-doubt. That damned inner critic.... Oh and its good friend, comparisonitis!
Aw lovely invite Sara. Hard relate! That last one thought - it’s really not talked about enough is it gosh - my entire early career was drowned in those accidental energy vampires in this face 🤔🫤. For me, it’s being interupted - like even the need to drink or answer the door when I’m talking or in flow, I’d just rather not. It’s a problem sometimes ❤️🫥
It feels like someone has crept into the loft rooms of my mind, these points all ring so very true with me. Yet I'm here on my own, no disturbances but still so many times, inspiration withers on the vine. I find working with an accountability buddy things progress better, the flame keeps burning merrily and I get things done
Oooh yes to the accountability buddy. A perfect place to share the spark and get enough excitement to fuel the next stage!